Is this doomed to fail? Probably. But why should I let a small thing like that stop me?

Well, let me start by explaining the title for this blog. It is there because sometimes, just occasionally, I will attempt to write something here that vaguely will follow the same topic. This will be very difficult for me, since I have the unfortunate attention span of a very small kitten in an aviary, and will most likely trail off in the middle of such a post trying to explain how you write a graph on someone's sexuality and whether or not you can use the equation for such a graph and the equation for someone else's graph to see if the lines ever cross each other (in n-space, of course, n being short for "nupitals" in this case) to see if those two should/could/would marry, which would be really cool, and probably possible too, if I could only reduce the number of variables - "sex", "money", "romance" and "kids" have to stay, but it would be nice if I could get rid of such cumbersome terms as "toilet seat" and  "why are you always so rude to my mother?" but if I could just...

Where was I again? Oh, yes. The topic. When I feel mentally capable of handling staying on topic, I will write a post that will contain something that I think most of us have wished existed at some point: A rule-book on how to not act/look/be percieved as a total moron by fellow human beings. I mean, I sure wish that I had some rules to rely on once in a while, instead of awkwardly fumbling my way through life. And I know, I know, there are already a thousand blogs like these on the internet, but... uh... none of them are written by me? And that has to count for something, right?

Some of the rules will simply be the practical "Do this to stay alive" kind of rules. Others will be the more subtle "Do this to not be an utter jerk" or "This is really dumb, so don't do it" kind of rules. Of course, considering that I have no authority what so ever, and that you're all basically free to utterly disregard anything I say, it'll be more guidlines than rules as per se. But I'll say "rules" anyway, because that sort of indicates that if you don't follow them I'll turn up on your doorstep and visit THE WRATH OF GOD upon you, and maybe that'll make you pause before saying something utterly dipshitty. I do this for your own good, see?
You are very welcome.

Otherwise, I will waste the time of my potential readers with telling you all about my life, my personal insanities, and the million ways that life has of freaking me the fuck out. If this sounds even remotely funny, then stick around.... you evil bastards.

Peace out.